In about 1 weeks’ time, we will be packing up and leaving…

Leaving a place that for the last (almost) 5 years we have called home!

In this place, we grew to know each other – our likes, dislikes, arguments, and partnered adulation's. We have both gone through emotional and physical struggles in our personal lives, and experienced life as we had both hoped to live before we had found each other. Since finding each other, living together, marrying each other …. I have found that life couldn't be any better, nor could have been shared with anyone more capable of encapsulating the word beautiful.

We have added our personal touch to a place that was an abode for everything that we held true to our-selves in an attempt to strengthen our friendship and build a familial structure – I believe we have been successful!

Sometimes we argue, sometimes we laugh, sometimes we love, sometimes we cry – we are human to the core, but have remained true to each other every step of the way.

As we will have ties and memories of our first place, (really the only dwelling we have known since the beginning), fresh memories will begin to unfold as our new domicile begins to take shape – you had asked me two questions when I found this place:

1) Can you see us having children here?, and 2) Can you see us growing old together here?

I believe the answer to both of those is an exciting and prodigious YES!

Tom Hummel

Job: 9; 27; “If I say “I will forget my complaint; I will change my expression and smile.”

It’s interesting to remember that in the beginning there was a warm and welcoming smile.

It was one that didn’t judge, but welcomed in full of joy.

An acceptance of at first being kind in return, and experiencing a fun loving environment, held together by the notion that all was right under his household.

A lover of the Outdoors; Humor; Picnics; Baseball; Scouts; God.

Early in life, afternoons were spent in the home of my best friend, Ben Hummel. Under the watchful eye of Lynn, or Gigi as she was known to us kids, we would play outside, or attempt to reach high scores on this new awesome game called brick-out and wait for someone to pick us up after school. We would enjoy cook-outs by Tom and the backyard grill, and Scotty frolicking around from an unseen and unbreakable bond. (Later on, the mantle would be picked up by Goldie.)

When venturing to King Soopers, it was not so uncommon to see Tom in the deli department, whereupon he would take time to visit and even when busy would give a smile and a wave. Sometimes, I would go to the store and just chat with him – he had that welcoming soul, and kind heart.

When a traumatic event happened to me in high school, my family and I moved to the other side of town. I eventually lost touch with Ben, as when his senior year had ended, he unbeknownst to me also moved to the other side of town to his grandmother’s ranch home.

Having been in a dark place after my event, there weren’t too many people I wanted to be around.

I had the idea to drive by Ben’s old Aurora home in search of reconnecting; alas I found an empty house.

I drove to the old King Soopers in search of that familiar warm greeting – also not to be found.

When my life had got back on track, how odd and at the same time a relief it was to see at the local King Soopers in my new and unfamiliar surroundings across town the warm smile I had been searching for.

It was Tom. Stocking the deli shelves, just as I had ever known him to do. And with him, his trademark smile as if no time had passed at all. A little grayer, but so was I. But a good, kind-hearted smile never fades.

I was able to reconnect with my childhood friend.

If it hadn’t been for the guiding light that was Tom, Ben would not have been my Best Man at my wedding.

But what really constitutes a Best Man?

The measure of a Best Man are the morals and ethics by which he lives: True, kind, selfless, giving, self-sacrificing, genuine, forgiving, accepting – these are attributes of a Best Man; the qualities of which have been passed down to Tom’s sons Ben, Dan, Tommy, Ted, and Chris, all of whom I have considered brothers.

The last time I saw Tom, he was in a nursing home of sorts while his internal suffering was increasing.

What amazed me the most is that without complaint, he beamed his smile to me as if no time had passed at all; no fear, no pain – a smile to carry on, and a memory to hold.

This is Tom Hummel.

Respect is taken, when respect is given...

Namaste and Slainte
~BG~

The Third of Which: Love

Love. I know, sappy. Especially if you know me, this seems to be true!

There is no way around it! It’s a feeling that supersedes lust. It is more common to have lust at first sight, than love at first sight. It is a rare thing indeed to find someone at the first look and just know this person is the one – it’s love, and it’s just a feeling - you know what I’m talking about and can only explain it if you ever felt it.

I believe animals feel this sense of love, too. You can see it in their eyes and actions of happiness, loyalty, and trust. Rescuing a pet from a shelter or otherwise unwanted environment and letting them know love is the greatest gift they can receive, no matter how short or long may be their time with us.

Sometimes all it takes is a short time to realize what love is; to reaffirm what loving unconditionally means, even in the face of a traumatic event – it’s knowing individually what love is and personally means that draws us closer to this aspect of human conditioning.

A sense of belonging, and closeness.

A notion of butterflies when you go on Date #1 or Date #1000.

The heartbreaking pang of loneliness when a person that you love is not near or no longer here.

Love is as great a thing as it is heartbreaking – and it’s awesome.

Respect is taken, when respect is given…

Namaste and Slainte
~BG~

The Second Installment...

The Second of which is: Family

What is family? What makes a good family structure?

For me it’s the bond that is shared between groups of people that no matter what, you are there for each other. It’s a love that can only be explained by having roots that form deep in the soul and a sense of belonging in long standing traditions from generations of history.

Family hardens the personal morals and ethics that keep us grounded, and we pass these down to whomever we meet, and to the family we might eventually create.

What if you don’t have a family directly? You don’t know where you came from? Displaced?

Your best of friends are often the best family. It’s still the camaraderie between like-minded individuals; striving toward the ultimate goal of sharing life with the people that make it bearable to live.

It’s the soothing notion that when you drive across town or country that open arms will be waiting for you; the notion that when you pick up the phone and make a call it will be like no time passed at all.

Extended Family gives an all new meaning to the term family. It encompasses a whole new life that is shared with a loved one. The extended family is like a family you never knew existed, yet always knew were there. 

They are the newest edition to life that makes sharing a life with a loved one so worthwhile.

A lot of time has passed since the writing of my first part almost two years ago…

…Including marrying that girl I told you about - 09/13/12

Respect is taken, when respect is given…

Namaste and Slainte

~BG~

The First of 3

A new stage in my life begins soon, and there are three points I wish to reflect upon.

The first of which is: Friends.

Through life, in every step of the way, the friends are what help guide us in the social realm. Through the many ups and downs of a friendship, there is always a friend around to help guide us through whichever time we are experiencing. Guidance is such a loose term to describe what we actually get from a friendship, but the path we walk often makes us stumble and we are always grateful of the helping hand we receive. Or the path may show us something funny, and we have a friend with which to laugh.

There is always the friend we can go to when the worst of times happens. The shoulder and ear they provide is immeasurably coveted at every ill step. The one that is there, no matter what; a text, a call, or a meet they always take the time to make everything better.

Then there is the friend that makes us goofy, because we can act goofy and feel safe doing so. There is always a laugh and a smile to be had, and it doesn't matter the current disposition, good times are always had.

There may even be friends that are no longer with us, but have left a lasting impression one way or another. And to them I say Thank You.

There are also the friends that you might have known for 30 years! Those are the ones that have such a deep incalculable meaning, that they are here for a lifetime. Then there are the ones that you may have met recently, that you just have that feeling you will be in good contact with for a long time to come. Friends are all so uniquely different, there is no telling when you might meet the next one!

I am so very proud of the friends I have in life; to be able to share good times and sympathize during the rough times. They have all shaped my life into the person I am today, and I am a better person because of them. And as I venture to the next stage in life, I tell you all – I appreciate your worth in how you have enriched my life.

I once had in my Email signature “A person without a soul friend, is a person without a head.” Friends keep us grounded in everything we do.

I am also lucky to have found in a person the one true friend that I can always go to whenever something is troubling me, and the one who makes me laugh constantly - I get to marry her in September.

Respect is taken, when respect is given ...

Namaste and Slainte

~BG~